Money, Power, or Health? The Status Game That Actually aligns with Happiness
Money and power are some of the most common benchmarks of status. Photo by Yaroslav Muzychenko on Unsplash.
Reading time: 8 minutes
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The Psychology of Status Games: Money, Power, Freedom, and Health
In this article we’ll look at the psychology behind comparison and status anxiety, explain why we compare ourselves to others, and explore the traditional status games of money, power, and professional prestige. We’ll then show why these rarely bring lasting happiness and how to overcome status anxiety by choosing healthier games—Financial Independence, health, and kindness.
Why Do We Compare Ourselves to Others? The Psychology of Status
Why do we compare ourselves to others—to their income, homes, careers, and looks? It’s not just some form of mental weakness, it’s part of how we’re wired. Humans evolved to seek respect and a sense of belonging because losing status meant exclusion from the tribe. In a context of scarcity, exclusion could literally mean death.
But in today’s world of abundance, that ancient urge to conform with others remains very central to us. In the last decade, it’s even been amplified by social media and increased global connectivity.
While we used to compare ourselves to a handful of neighbors or colleagues, we now measure ourselves also against billionaires, influencers, and celebrities from other continents—people we will almost certainly “lose” to when playing the status and comparison game.
The result is a bit of a paradox—the instinct that developed over millennia to help us survive now has the potential of making us miserable. Unfortunately, when we work towards what we perceive others have accomplished we fall into what psychologists call the hedonic treadmill—no matter the gain, we adapt quickly to it and are left searching for more.
We routinely compare ourselves to colleagues, neighbors, and friends. Is there a healthy way out of this comparison cycle? Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash.
So many of us keep asking, “Why do I compare myself with others?”, but the psychology behind comparison shows it’s not a personal weakness, but part of how our brains are wired to seek belonging and status.
Unfortunately, as a result of hedonic adaptation, the bigger house, higher salary, or better vacations each become the new baseline, leaving us restless. If none of these upgrades have really improved our lives, what will? Comparison has no finish line—this is why traditional status games of money and power often end in burnout, regret, or disillusionment.
If we can’t opt out of the social comparison game, then the real question is not “How do we stop playing?” but “Which game should we choose to play instead?” The smarter move here, I think, is to choose comparison games that align with enhancing happiness and quality of life rather than diminishing it.
If we redirect our ancestral instinct towards healthier benchmarks—such as freedom, health, and kindness—then our natural desire for respect could actually enrich both our lives and those of others instead of draining it. I’ve written before about the role of status in money and class (see: Status, Money, Freedom, Truth Games and What is Considered Upper Class). This post builds on that foundation by focusing on healthier alternatives.
The most common status benchmark is the money game—but will playing it bring us lasting life satisfaction? Photo by Mitch on Unsplash.
The Money Game: Why Rich People Still Aren’t Happy
The money game is the most prevalent status game in modern life. At first glance, it seems to make sense—after all, more money means more comfort, security, and opportunities. Research shows money does improve happiness up to the point where basic comfort and security are covered, but beyond that threshold—and especially when it turns into a yardstick of self-worth—it creates a trap of never having enough.
Think of billionaires, who continue to chase more not because they need it, but because they are comparing themselves to their peers on the same ladder. Someone will always have more than them, so this game finds no real endpoint or place of lasting contentment.
Even worse, many play the appearance of wealth game. Flashy cars, large homes, or luxury brands—these represent key items in the status theater. But behind the scenes, many players are actually “house poor” and living paycheck to paycheck to maintain their projected illusion of success.
The irony is that some people who look richest often have the least financial independence, and are in reality chained to jobs they dislike in order to continue funding their image. This is a classic case of lifestyle inflation or lifestyle creep, where the pursuit of status leads people to spend more as they earn more, often leaving them even less financially secure.
Pursuing wealth also comes with many hidden costs. Careers designed around maximizing income often demand long hours, high stress, and complete immersion—it can leave little room for anything else in life. When time for family, hobbies, or rest is squeezed out, money has become the dominant driver, turning life into a grind. Although this hustle culture is sometimes celebrated—everyone likes to remind others of how busy they are—it hides the costs of burnout, strained and lost relationships, and declining health.
This is why it’s well documented that one of the top regrets of the dying is wishing they hadn’t worked so hard. The money game can be rewarding in the moment, but over a lifetime it can deliver the very opposite of what we hoped for. Wealth can certainly be advantageous—the Stoics would say a “preferred indifferent”—but chasing it endlessly can erode freedom, health, and joy from our lives.
Playing the power game can be intoxicating, but can come at great personal cost. Photo by Marco Oriolesi on Unsplash.
* Further Reading – Article continues below *
The Power Game: Status, Influence, and the Cost of Authority
For others, the game isn’t about money but about power and authority. Think of politicians, executives, or even lower-level officials. No matter at what level, humans are attracted to the intoxicating feeling of respect or influence.
A police officer or an embassy administrator may not be wealthy, but they wield real control over other people’s lives. The ability to command obedience, be noticed, or make decisions that matter—this is the essence of the power game.
To be clear, power itself isn’t inherently bad—used in service of others, it can drive positive change. But when pursued mainly as a status signal, its costs usually outweigh the rewards.
It’s appeal ultimately lies in control. It signals importance, the ability to shape outcomes and influence other people’s behavior. Unlike wealth, which can be silent, power is visible in each interaction. But as history and politics show, chasing power usually comes at great personal cost. It demands constant attention, endless networking, and a willingness to sacrifice your personal life.
Power often corrodes—the more you gain, the more you fear losing it. Powerful individuals become paranoid, adversarial, and trapped in an environment where trust is always lacking. As with the money game, relationships suffer, families are neglected, and genuine friendships become rare.
Power brings respect, but it's usually born out of fear. Ultimately the power game is also very fragile. Lose the title, the office, or the role, and your influence evaporates overnight. Respect that is rooted in position is temporary—it’s rented, not owned. Unlike health or freedom, power doesn’t endure beyond the structures that support it—and therefore won’t grant lasting life satisfaction either.
Certain professions—professors, surgeons, lawyers, scientists—also confer status. Photo by Shubham Sharan on Unsplash.
The Professional Game: Knowledge, Prestige, and Status Anxiety
A third path to status is the pursuit of professional prestige. Surgeons, professors, lawyers, or scientists gain respect of others through their expertise and mastery. Society confers admiration to those who have achieved technical excellence or academic authority, which is why so many people that ask themselves, “How do I build my status in life?", turn to professional achievement as the answer.
This game certainly feels nobler than chasing money or power because it tends to be linked to contribution and knowledge. Indeed, at its best, it can feel rewarding. A professor deeply absorbed in research may love the work so much that status is just a nice byproduct to have—not the main prize. A doctor passionate about helping others may gain admiration while also finding a life full of purpose.
In cases like these, prestige arises naturally as a byproduct of passion and contribution—making it sustainable rather than corrosive. In these cases, the status game of knowledge is aligned with genuine interest, so gaining status through your profession doesn’t corrode.
But the downside can be severe. High-pressure fields often demand exhausting hours, constant stress, and a complete commitment to the profession. Emergency surgeons are known to have higher rates of burnout and even shorter life expectancy as a result of the punishing lifestyle that is demanded of them. But it’s true of other professionals too—many end up sacrificing health, family, and freedom to climb a ladder that may feel increasingly hollow over time.
Some job descriptions come with cool-sounding titles, but what’s it really like to spend the day in meetings? Photo by Campaign Creators on Unsplash.
I’ve seen a version of this in my own career. Earlier on, I felt unconsciously drawn to pursue certain “respectable” roles, probably because of the status attached to them, not because the work genuinely excited me. At least, not like it would an artist, a writer, or a chef.
On paper, some of my previous jobs and titles looked impressive, but in reality they left me drained and stressed, wondering whether the trade-offs were worth it. I recently took the bold move of quitting my job to pursue an alternative pathway that could better align with my lifestyle preferences. So, far it has felt extremely liberating.
The distinction mentioned earlier is important. If your career aligns with interest and passion, prestige comes naturally as a byproduct and enriches life. But if the main driver is mainly social comparison—going into a “respectable” profession chasing titles, recognition, and the validation of others—then the professional game can become just as toxic as playing the money or power games.
Without passion, prestige alone rarely provides long-term life satisfaction. Ask yourself: would you really continue in your current job if you had the financial means not to?
If prestige alone doesn’t satisfy, what does? One answer lies in freedom—specifically, control of your own time.
Financial Independence allows you to be time-rich—the best wealth of them all. Photo by Mesut Kaya on Unsplash.
Freedom and Time: Why Financial Independence Beats Being Rich
The most underrated form of wealth is freedom and control over your time. You may have a high salary or a prestigious profession, but if you had enough money saved away, would you really continue working 40-to-60-hour weeks on someone else’s project?
Control over your time is the essence of pursuing Financial Independence (FI). It grants you the ability to design life on your own terms without dependence on employment. Unlike money or power, which often demand more of your time and energy, FI gives life back. It allows you to spend your days as you choose, to say no to others without fear, and to structure your life around your values and lifestyle preferences.
While not everyone will retire at 35, almost everyone has the agency to move closer to financial independence. Even incremental steps—like building a savings buffer, reducing debt, or investing consistently—shift the balance of power back to you and expand your freedom.
Yet we also face a paradox in this category too. Unlike flashy wealth or visible power, time freedom is largely invisible to others. Nobody can see that you don’t need to work, and bragging about it will only trigger resentment rather than admiration. This is why many in the FI space embrace the idea of stealth wealth—quietly enjoying independence without needing public validation.
And that is precisely the catch. Financial Independence works beautifully as a personal life strategy, but poorly as an external status game. It may provide unmatched joy and security on the inside, yet nearly no recognition from the outside. You just can’t go around telling others “I don’t need to work” without making them uncomfortable or resentful.
While pursuing early Financial Independence may be the wisest game for living well, it doesn’t really satisfy our ancestral instinct for visible respect. That’s where health could enter the picture. Unlike FI, health can be both deeply fulfilling internally and highly visible externally. Good health signals discipline, knowledge, and time freedom, and it’s one of the few areas where displaying your “status” rarely creates envy. If anything, it inspires others to follow.
FI may be the wisest game for living well, but it doesn’t meet our hard-wired need for visible respect. That’s where health steps in—a game that satisfies both the inner and outer measures of status.
Health is the new wealth. Unlike other forms of status, this one is really good for you and others. Photo by Alexander Red on Unsplash.
Health as Wealth: The Healthiest Way to Build Status
As noted by entrepreneur and health enthusiast Bryan Johnson, society crowns the riches, fastest, and strongest people, but nobody officially celebrates the “healthiest human”. Yet health as wealth may be the most overlooked status game of all. Unlike money or power—which often corrode happiness—the health game can actually enhance it.
Good health is multidimensional. It signals discipline, foresight, and mastery over one’s habits and impulses. You can’t fake health the way you can fake wealth with a leased car or prestige with a title. Fitness, energy, and mental clarity must be built consistently through three key categories—sleep, exercise, and nutrition.
That makes it in my view a more authentic signal of status—one rooted in applied wisdom and aligned with leading a good life. One emerging framework for doing exactly this is algorithmic living—designing personal “life algorithms” that make healthy decisions automatic rather than willpower-based.
Of course, health is also shaped by genetics and circumstances, but most of us still retain significant agency through our daily choices—and that’s where meaningful gains are made.
Unlike money or power, pursuing health rarely provokes resentment. If you say, “No thanks, I’m skipping dessert—trying to focus here on my health”, others may admire you for your discipline. By visibly prioritizing your well-being, you quietly project self-respect and long-term thinking.
I also find health intersects nicely with Financial Independence and its associated time freedom. To maintain good health does require substantial time—time to cook well, sleep properly, and exercise consistently. This signals independence and agency over your own schedule. Showing up in excellent health demonstrates not only knowledge and discipline, but also that you are sufficiently free to prioritize what matters most. It’s hard to think of other games that align so closely with both status and a lasting sense of contentment.
To maintain good health can require a lot of time—health and Financial Independence can align nicely. Photo by John Arano on Unsplash.
Redirecting Comparison: How to Overcome Status Anxiety
The truth is, we can’t escape comparing ourselves to others—it’s hardwired into human psychology. But we do have the power to redirect social comparison toward games that enrich rather than diminish life.
Learning how to overcome status anxiety may not be about quitting the game, but about shifting it. Instead of asking, “Who’s the richest?” or “Who has the most influence?”, we can ask, “Who’s the healthiest? Who’s the freest? Who’s the kindest?”
This shift also helps us break free from the hedonic treadmill. While gains in wealth or possessions tend to fade quickly into the background, improvements in health, freedom, or kindness retain their meaning and continue to shape our quality of life. Being healthier allows us to enjoy life’s experiences more fully and gaining freedom gives us the space to choose what matters.
Kindness and compassion add the final layer. When we compare along these dimensions, admiration replaces resentment. A life lived with generosity earns respect naturally, without the hostility that traditional status games generate. The instinct to compare doesn’t disappear, but—like with health—it transforms into something constructive: status that rooted in wisdom, care, and positive influence.
Choose Financial Independence, health, and kindness and compassion over money, power, and professional prestige. Photo by Lucas Clara on Unsplash.
Conclusion: Choosing the Right Status Game for Happiness
As we covered, traditional status games—chasing money, power, or prestige—promise satisfaction but often lead to regret. They pull us towards never-ending comparison, consume our time, and erode what matters most—freedom, heath, and joy.
But if we accept that comparison is inevitable, we can still choose to play a better game. By playing games that are aligned with life satisfaction—Financial Independence, health, and kindness—we can redirect an ancient instinct into something that actually improves our lives. These games don’t just look good from the outside, they also feel good from the inside.
The ultimate path is clear: health gives us vitality, freedom gives us time, and kindness gives us community. Together, all three create respect that doesn’t corrode but endures. This is a status game worth playing—one where winning means living well and positively influencing others.
💬 I'd love to hear your thoughts—how do you deal with social comparison and status in your life? Have you found practical strategies to move past it? Please let us know in the comments!
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🌿 Thanks for reading The Good Life Journey. I share weekly insights on money, purpose, and health, to help you build a life that compounds meaning over time. If this resonates, join readers from over 100 countries and subscribe to access our free FI tools and newsletter.
Don’t miss our article on the different types of “upper class” or the post where we discuss Bertrand Russell’s advice for a happy life.
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Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)
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We compare ourselves because our brains evolved to seek belonging and avoid exclusion. Status signals safety in groups. In modern life, social media and global visibility amplify this instinct, making comparisons constant and often unhealthy.
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The root of comparison is evolutionary psychology. Humans survived by tracking status in small groups. Today, this survival mechanism misfires when applied to billions of people, leaving us restless on the hedonic treadmill.
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You can’t switch off the instinct, but you can redirect it. Instead of chasing money or power, compare yourself on healthier dimensions like health, time freedom, or kindness. These deliver respect without eroding happiness.
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Status can come from wealth, power, or prestige, but these are fragile and comparison-driven. Health, freedom, and kindness give status that feels good internally and earns genuine respect externally.
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Status is position-based respect—tied to money, title, or appearance. Influence is trust-based respect—built through actions, wisdom, and relationships. Influence endures; status often vanishes when the title is gone.
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Traditional ways include making money, gaining power, or pursuing professional prestige. But healthier ways are investing in your health, achieving financial independence, and practicing kindness. These build status while improving quality of life.
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Rich people often aren’t happier because of the hedonic treadmill. Wealth quickly becomes the new baseline, and someone else always has more. Without freedom, health, or meaningful relationships, money alone rarely satisfies.
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